Lack of sleep,memorizing,feeling sick,almost giving up. is all over. Yes,it's all over the exam is over.
And now a new week where we bring our books to school and listen whatever the teacher teaches, some lying on the table in their own world of colourful dreams, some try to make their text book interesting by drawing and writing on the page which teacher told us to flip to, some who didn't do well in their mid-term are taking their pen and copy down the important things.
In these three days of school, students are nervous when teacher comes in with a stack of paper, that's right exam paper. Everyone sitting on the end of their sits hearts pumping faster then normal, and there teacher calling out names one by one there are some walking out with confident, some legs are shaking while reaching out to their exam paper, some put on a smile trying to hide their embarrassing marks. When everyone got their paper the class noise was louder then before. Teasing each other, comparing whose better,admiring others mark, some find it hard to smile. Like always some people marks will have rainbow colors and others will have red colors which match their face.In the bus in just never ends all talking about their result. You might be thinking "how about you?"
Me? Hmm... I did it again like always. Marks you will never imagine you can even have a heart attack and fall on the floor. I plan on not telling my parents I'll shall wait for parents day. I didn't mean to disappoint them no i did not. But i told my sis about it and all she said was "you didn't work hard enough"'you're to confident" Confident? Oh pls if i am i wouldn't be shaking inside when teacher call my name, at that moment it felt weird it was like my heart was about to tear into pieces it hurt me. This was like my 1st time working so hard i never work so hard before and i did improve and she could only say that. I didn't know what to do so i stand up and hold my breath and tell her I'm going to bathe i lied. I went into the bathroom to cry. It wasn't just about what she say but i was afraid to hurt my parents again cause i remember my sis once ask my parents "what the best give your children can give?", i shouted love but i guess my parent didn't hear me they say just give me a good result that's all i ask. Immediately i shut up. That is something i haven't gave to them for a long time since i was eight. Its been six years coming home with those shitty result. At night i just couldn't sleep. People might think rachel oh that happy crazy funny one.
Yeah on the outside. in the inside she's full hurt sometimes she cries to sleep and sometimes she doesn't no why her tears come out to play, she's confuse all she could do is to hide her feelings all to herself cause she thinks that why should you tell people about your feeling and your problem. All they can do is past around gossipping about your issues. And she doesn't like to tell people about her things.
She only tell it to the LORD GOD almighty cause he will be there comforting her and help her and fill his love in her heart and so her hurts will be perish. Thank you LORD Thank you Jesus.(So please don't force me to tell you why? what happen?, okay^^ you should know who you are)